I have sat down to write 4 different times today and just stare at the screen. It has been building all day, the anxiety that sits so deep inside me and I was just scared to talk about it. Now I feel like I just have to get it out. I am a different person today than I was 3 weeks ago. I have always been a confident, outspoken, opinionated person and today I find myself scared, anxious and helpless. I feel so weak. I know I have been through so much lately, but I hate the hopelessness that I feel in my heart.
I hate that when I see people, I see pity in their eyes. No one wants to be me, the lady that lost her daughter. I get it. Yah, it sucks. Let's face it, my circumstances blow. I think people are scared to be around me. I am scared about being around you. I am incredibly vulnerable and an emotional wreck. Who would want to be around that? I don't know who, but I don't blame you.I really don't know the point of this post, but it was what was inside. Thank you for letting me get it out.
3 comments:
Thank you for posting. I don't know what else to say other than that I'm praying for you.
Thinking about you; I completely understand these feelings (((hugs))).
I'm so sorrry for your pain. While I have not had a loss as far along as you have (10 weeks for me)I can understand your pain and not wanting to feel the pity. Praying that you find peace and comfort some way, some day.
Post a Comment