This is something I have really been struggling with the last 5 weeks. What am I? More to the point...Am I a Mother? This weekend brings many feelings to the forefront. I have been pregnant with my daughter. I delivered my daughter. I held my daughter. I put my daughter to rest. Yet, I still have people tell me that I will be a Mom someday. But aren't I already? Am I being naive to even think about considering myself a mother?
Mother's Day to me, hurts more than most days ever will. And the hurt starts weeks before the actual day because of all the commercial build-up. It simply reminds me that my daughter is not here and I won't be celebrated because of it. Yes, I have a wonderful Mother and I love her to death, but my hurt is too much right now for that to override my feelings. I am very ready for tomorrow to be over and done with so that I can move away from it and not be reminded every commercial or online ad that my daughter is not here. It's not something to be sorry about. It is just the way things are. I face it, deal with it and try to move on.